Coming home from the hospital with Jude was terrifying. Not only was I going to be taking care of a newborn, but also a very rambunctious 2 almost 3 year old.  I remember thinking "what did I get myself into?" "why did I do this?".  Tyler only got one week off from work so it was just me and the boys most of the time.  I didn't breastfeed for long (3 or 4 days) before realizing I just couldn't keep up with Jude's appetite.  It felt like I was feeding him every hour for 45 minutes each time.  It just became too much for my sanity and so I decided to formula feed.  Jude started sleeping a little more and I started becoming somewhat sane again.  I have had a few rough days with Jude not sleeping due to gas or being overtired.  It didn't help that Parker on those days would be extra bad by running around making a mess and not listening to a single thing I said.   One day I texted Tyler that I couldn't do it anymore and I'm pretty sure I had a nervous break down.  He thankfully left work early so that he could come home and take over.  He let me sleep the whole night which helped my mental state tremendously.  It was hard and there was a lot of off and on crying during those 6 weeks.  Another issue was after having Jude I worried about my bond with Parker.  I cried all the time thinking that I wouldn't get one on one time with him anymore.  But I figured it out and I still put Parker to bed every night by myself.

Things are finally starting to feel more at ease and life with 2 kids is becoming amazing. I just can't wait until Jude is older and running around trying to keep up with his big brother!
^yea this happened and yes Parker got stuck^
^Parker looking all sweet but the reason Jude is crying was his sweet brother was being  a little to rough with him^

No comments